What do people in relationship converse about/share?

Intimacy is one of the most popular words in relationships, and means different thing to different people.

Merriam Webster dictionary defines intimacy as: “ a state of being intimate: familiarity. Synonym: belonging, closeness…”

However, most couples have a rather bogus view of what intimacy is about and often see it as just physical (sexual) awareness or relations with their partners, so the superficial gains preeminence.

Intimacy is not just belonging to each other in a physical way but entails a closeness that comes as a result of communicating what is most important to one’s life and existence, understanding your role in that timeline; the steps that are taken to achieve them; and being actively involved in providing the support and advice needed to navigate these goals— mental stimulation.

It is not enough to know basic details of your partners such as family background, hobbies, turn-on/off, occupation; provide, care and pay attention to their basic needs; knowing and understanding their plans for their lives is of the uttermost importance, and does not only show maturity, but also a high level of commitment, thus,  bringing you closer.

Knowledge of your partner’s goals and dreams help to streamline reciprocal needs and support— you know what is expected of you. Partners who know and understand/ share dreams and goals are more likely to succeed than those who do not.


How to become intimate by sharing goals.

1. Communicate (with details and understanding).

Communicate your goals with great detail, and with a reflection of your spouse’s relevance to the set goals (let them know and feel they are a part); this creates a sense of belonging and lessen friction.

Meanwhile ensure your goals are SMART— specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timed because they say to a large extent if you are a potential partner and goal-getter or just a day-dreamer.


2. Making plans (both career and relationship plans) together creates joy and hope for a better tomorrow. It bonds partners.


3. Meditate (or pray) together on your goals. Spouses should make it a culture to make a mental picture that they both will love to feature in the future (motivational speech jargon, huh? Aspire to inspire)


4. Exchange ideas, advice, and support; point out lapses while proffering pragmatic solutions; for example:

Read and research on your partner’s areas of interest and share the information with them. It will strengthen your bond and closeness, and teel them beyond words that you are really interested in them.

Sincerely, thank you for reading.

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  1. Thanks sweetheart, I am in hundred percent agreement to all you have shared. Intimacy via communication is sure a necessary tool especially in our world of today where intimacy has been equated to sex. Thanks for the reminder

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